I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
