People with herpes should wear stickers.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
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