my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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