you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
