thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
