another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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