What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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