We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize