Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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