My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
