Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
