You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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