i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize