so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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