She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
