Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
