he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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