How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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