So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
