i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
