he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Please don't give away my fajitas
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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