where am i from again
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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