Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize