i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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