I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
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