Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize