I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
