ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
