We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Randomize
