u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Jerry, you need to find god
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I need water and some morals
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
