one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I smell like Dick and happiness
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
