I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
that's an acceptable place to lick
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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