I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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