Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
