Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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