he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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