I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
