He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize