two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Randomize
