he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
tell your sister to shave her snatch
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
