You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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