It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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