I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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