I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
