I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
