I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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