I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
