Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
