butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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