and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Randomize
