I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
